Michael Scott

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Bleeding Steel


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Movie: :1.5stars:
Video: :3.5stars:
Audio: :4stars:
Extras: :halfstar:
Final Score: :2.5stars:



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Movie

Jackie Chan was one one of my childhood martial arts idols. I grew up watching the WB Saturday morning Kung-fu movies, filling my mind with Shaw Brothers films, The Fearless Hyena, Drunkin Master, Meals on Wheels, Project A, Police Story, Supercop, and many others. By the time I was in high school I would watch anything the Asian action would put out. I still remember skipping a class my freshman year of college so that I could go and see a cheap showing of Rush Hour, or dragging my girlfriend to reluctantly go see Shanghai Noon. However, all good things must come to an end, and Jackie’s box office draw started waning after Rush Hour 3. He was in his early 50s at that point, and the man who LITERALLY made his career on doing death defying stunts, had to hire a stuntman for some of his movies. I don’t blame him one bit. A person’s body starts to age and you can’t do the same things you did when you were 25, dumb and believe you can take anything (the man was legendary for breaking bones on set, and his personal stunt team was literally uninsurable by any company. Chan is reported at having to pay their health insurance out of pocket due to that fact). But even though the man couldn’t contort his body like he used to didn’t mean his career was over. Films like Little Big Soldier, The Foreigner, Shaolin, and Police Story: Lockdown proved that he could still make films that didn’t require him to be a physical god on set. Plus his voice acting skills in the Kung Fu Panda series (and several other animated works) kept him viable. But lately, Jackie’s works have been less than stellar. Films like Skiptrace, Railroad Tigers, and Namiya have been less than stellar. It’s almost as if the venerable actor is just working because he’s bored (he IS worth $350 million), and not really worrying about his scripts. But nothing can come close to sheer putridness that is Bleeding Steel, a movie that actually beats The Tuxedo for being the worst Jackie Chan movie of all time.

Bleeding Steel opens with a vignette about about a special forces operative by the name of Lin Dong having to escort a special government wit-sec target to a government facility in lieu of seeing his dying daughter Xixi, only to be beset upon by a mysterious power rangers knockoff covered in white and black paint like Mr. Freeze. Lin’s team is torn apart by armored soldiers with rubber paint ball uniforms on (at least that’s what it looks like, only to sacrifice himself to save the target. Jumping ahead 13 years, the film segues directly over to Sydney, Australia, where a young girl by the name of Nancy (Na-Na OuYang) is struggling with strange dreams. It soon becomes apparent that she is dreaming of the same monster that fought Lin Dong those 13 years ago, and as she struggles for answers, she is set upon by a mysterious masked man, and a leather dressed woman commanding the same armored soldiers that flanked the Mr. Freeze looking super soldier from back then as well.

Yup, the masked man is nothing other than Lin Dong himself, who has been keeping a low profile and amassing an arsenal as well. The woman is exactly who you think she is as well. A minion of Andre, the Mr. Freeze super soldier, who has been wallowing in pain for the last 13 years. While the film tries to keep everything under wraps until the final arc, it’s painfully obvious from the getgo what is going on. The wit-sec target was actually a doctor who had created bio-engineered blood, as well as a mechanical heart that would support this super blood. Andre was actually a previous experiment of his that went wrong (they never explain what went wrong. In fact they don’t explain much of anything), and Nancy is Xixi all grown up. The good doctor had spent his last dying breath transferring his super blood (and mechanical heart) into the dyeing daughter of Lin Dong, and she is the only one who can cure Andre’s dilapidated condition after his explosive battle with the super agent 13 years prior.
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Yeah, if my description seems a bit chaotic, it’s because that’s exactly how the film is. This tech noir, cyberpunk, comedy martial arts action flick is just plain bonkers. The film caters to no one in particular, with a story revolving a father reconnecting with his daughter, while she runs away from rapists in Sydney Australia, after coming from a psycho therapy lesson from a Witch, while the villain sends super soldiers through the streets of Sydney, all from his command space ship hovering just over the bay. I swear I’m not making any of that up either. This has to be the most putrid and banal of all of Chan’s film, even outing The Tuxedo and Skiptrace as the worst Jackie Chan movies of all time. The tone is all over the place, with huge swashes of classic slapstick comedy reminiscent of Mr. Nice Guy, only to be replaced with dark cyberpunk action scenes complete with ridiculous vinyl outfits, and comic book villains straight out of a Joel Schumacher Batman film. The insanity of a mechanical heart, memories through blood, and a tossed away super soldier looking for revenge are only icing on the proverbial cake, giving the film such a ludicrous scenario that even the most rabid Chan fan is going to be rolling in the aisles laughing.

Chang actually gives a semblance of caring about his role in the film, but he’s really the only one. Everyone else is B-level and C-level actors, giving forth some of the most cringe worthy dialog I have ever seen. You can see why Bleeding Steel dive bombed in it’s own country of China, and pretty much fizzled on the home video market. The action sequences are usually the highlight of any Jackie Chan film, and while they’re competently choreographed, are just all over the place like the rest of the movie. Sweet hand to hand combat scenes are broken up with high flying wire work, and CGI flips and stunt men that just feel a run of the mill action flick. Chan is pretty decent at keeping up with the rest of them, and while it’s obvious he uses a stunt double for some of the high flying work, the guy can still move for being 64 years old.




Rating:

Rated R for violence and some language




Video: :3.5stars:
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Lionsgate’s Blu-ray of Bleeding Steel isn’t a wild step up over the movie itself sadly. From the opening shots I got a bit worried as the screen was riddled with edge enhancement and a wonky softness to the long and medium shots. Close ups were much better, with sharper clarity and some really good detail levels (sometimes too good, as you could see the makeup lines on Andre’s black and white face, as well as the cheap CGI and Tech Noir costumes), but that edge enhancement stays with us the entire movie, haloing faces and background objects throughout the whole film. Black levels are actually rather good, with a depth and level of detail that is quite astounding at times. There’s not any real issues with black crush, and the colors are bright and neon tinged. It’s a decent looking image in all reality, but the edge enhancement is pretty glaring, and combined with the softness of the medium and long shots, makes for a mediocre viewing experience.





Audio: :4stars:
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There are two voice options for the film, with the first being a Mandarin and English mixed track in 5.1 DTS-HD MA, and a dubbed over English track in the same lossless format. The dubbed track is pretty stinking painful, so I’m going to have to go with the original Mandarin/English track (it’s a weird hybrid of English and Mandarin, that switches back and forth depending on who’s talking to whom in the film) as the one to choose if you MUST watch this film. Easily the best part of the movie, the 5.1 mix is fairly aggressive, with lots of mid range bass and a pretty impressive use of the surround channels. Bass isn’t chest cracking, but it adds a lot of oomph to the phaser blasts and explosions in the opening sequence. It’s not super nuanced, but there’s plenty of boom to go around. Surrounds are probably the most impressive part of the track, with lots of little beeps, creeps and sweeps in the background, while the vocals are the weakest part of the mix. I had to adjust volume levels several times, because the dialog would be crystal clear one moment, only to dip in volume a bit the next, requiring me to boost the volume on my receiver to hear what was being said.





Extras: :halfstar:
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• Theatrical Trailers








Final Score: :2.5stars:


Bleeding Steel is not nearly so awful to WATCH as it is an awful movie. I’m saying that because I actually was dying laughing the whole time. The film is so ludicrous and over the top with it’s genre mashups, that I was unintentionally guffawing the entire time. Don’t get me wrong, the film is HORRIFYING in about ever way, but that sheer level of awful stupidity almost made it kind of fun…...almost. Lionsgate’s Blu-ray release is pretty solid, with a pair of decent video/audio encodes, but there really isn’t any extras outside of 3 theatrical trailers for the film, and some Lionsgate trailers at the beginning of the disc. However, I wouldn’t worry about it as no one in their right mind has any interest in seeing what went on behind the scenes with this train wreck. Unless you are one of those rabid Jackie Chan fans who MUST see everything he does, this is best left on the rental shelf. Alone. Never to be seen by anyone if the gods have any mercy. Just run away.



Technical Specifications:

Starring: Jackie Chan, Show Lo, Na-Na OuYang
Directed by: Leo Zhang
Written by: Erica Xia-Hou, Siwei Cui
Aspect Ratio: 2.39:1 AVC
Audio: English: DTS-HD MA 5.1, Mandarin/English DTS-HD MA 5.1
Subtitles: English, Mandarin, English SDH
Studio: Lionsgate
Rated: R
Runtime: 110 Minutes
Blu-ray Release Date: August 21st, 2018






Recommendation: Run Away in Terror

 
Last edited:

tripplej

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Thanks for the review. Never heard of it and after your review, will skip it. lol. :)
 
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